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title:
date: Sunday, April 11, 2010

好像缺了一塊 再拼不回來 比空白更空白 每一次我想起來 其實你都還在 藍色悲哀 流過我的靜脈 我不要愛 可是我離不開 假面的告白 不坦白的坦白 你不會愛 你只愛接受愛 眼睛睜不開 看不到未來 也哭不出來 好像碎了一塊 再補不回來 被時間活埋 從盛開到腐壞 然後愛 從潔白到蒼白從蒼白到塵埃 我想離開 可是我還期待 對自己 不坦白 你不會愛 我害怕接受愛 把兩手張開 抓不到未來 有你的未來 好像碎了得一塊 再補不回來 再不存在 我想起來 其實你都還在 濃的悲哀 化不開
if nobody understands, i dun rly care
maybe gor is right.
i cant love.
i never will learn
im just a player
i wil never be a lover.
i cant be.
i wil never be.
i love him.
but yet i hurt him more then i care for him.
if i let go,
i will hurt him alot
but then short pain better then long pain right?
how silly
it will leave a scar
someone told me,
that the words above are all bullshit
im capable of loving.
but then again.
in 7yrs i have nt cried.
is like in this yr suddenly i learn hw to cry since the death of my brother
and all at once i keep crying.
over th smallest of arguements
over th thought of losing him
yes im silly
yes im fucked up
and there is nobody to save me.
not now not ever
i dont even noe if anybody wil read this
i dont rly care
i hate myself more then ever now
why is it that my bro died and not me?
why not me?

posted by jellybeanies @ 6:56 AM
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